Ambiguity Begone

The "Introduction" assignment has led me into a deep thought regarding who I am, the artist and the human being. And I must admit that I have been in a state of ambiguity for a long time.....and I'm breaking out. 

I have studied Fine Arts academically since the seventh grade, therefore for twelve years, and I continue daily in this field. With so many years of dedication, one would assume that I want to be an artist, but I don't. I adore the practice and study of the arts, but I've wavered with the practicality possibilities with the field. And for years I have come up short-handed wanting to be creative in my work positions, but acknowledge the obligation to support myself and family. Simply, I was afraid to assist in the change of the world by being a Fine Arts educator because of the enormity of the task and my insecurities in my talent. 

I'm placing all of that aside and going for it! I had layers upon layers of "things" holding me back, but no longer will I let those things block my positive desires for change in the educational system through the study of Fine Arts. 

I used mixed-media for this piece that was constructed on a slab of wood. Oil pastels and acrylic paint are the primary media sources used. I wanted to create a painterly image. Since my image discusses "layers" and focuses on actively moving through the piece, I wanted a gesture-like medium (such as oil pastels) to reiterate my theme. The artwork is 5" x 15"  wooden panel found in my closet. At first I mapped an array of perspectives (a woman walking horizontally across the base, or her walking towards the audience), but I settled on this perspective because it was different and further urges the audience to understand that "I'm walking away" from ambiguity and clutter. The juxtapose patterns of color at the bottom of the image symbolizes clutter and represent my articles of clothing. Clothing is an interesting theory that's based on individual desire. "Maybe this shirt, with those pants, with that hat..." We dress ourselves. I dress myself in my own concerns, worries, stresses, and especially, insecurities. At any point in time, I can free myself (remove my clothes) and be a primitive being capable without my "clothes." 

I created this piece for encouragement and to make a personal stance for no more insecurities and worries. I'm going to set myself free from the bondage in which I enthrall myself.